


RAPTOR DARK JEDI BUTTHOLE INVASION

by ChucktheTingler



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Breaking the Fourth Wall, Chuck Tingle - Freeform, Dinosaurs, Earnest tribute, Humor, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-29
Updated: 2016-01-29
Packaged: 2018-05-16 22:49:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 495
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5844016
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChucktheTingler/pseuds/ChucktheTingler
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hux learns something completely unexpected about Kylo Ren.</p>
            </blockquote>





	RAPTOR DARK JEDI BUTTHOLE INVASION

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Carmarthen](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Carmarthen/gifts).



There was a lot more to working on a Star Destroyer than wearing jodphurs and yelling. Hux was starting to feel like he was trapped in the same cycle of submitting incidental damage reports, practicing how he said “Fire!”, and obsequiously nodding to a hologram. It was all so boring, and Hux still wasn’t emperor. 

And he had Kylo Ren to deal with. Ren, who generated 90% of the incidental damage reports all on his own. He’d never even seen Ren’s face! He could look like anything under the mask. Like some sort of devilman, or even a bigfoot. Whatever he was, Hux didn’t trust all the dark magic he used. 

Of course, Hux ended up sharing a cabin with Ren on the next First Order leadership retreat. Ren kept pacing nervously, bending his neck and holding his arms in front of his chest. There was a sort of swivel motion to his butt that Hux couldn’t peel his eyes away from. 

“Stop staring,” Ren said. 

Realization hit Hux like a night bus. “You’re a velociraptor.” 

There was a sigh through the vocoder. “How did you know?” 

“You’re standing on your toes.” 

Resigned, Ren said, “I guess I don’t have to hide myself anymore.” He lifted up the mask, revealing his unmistakably raptor-like nose and jawline. “You probably think I look weird.” 

“I think it’s kinda hot,” Hux purred. “From certain angles.” 

“Thanks,” blushed the raptor Force user. “So, do you want to pound my ass now?” 

Hux thought back to the title of the ficlet he was in. “But this is called RAPTOR DARK JEDI BUTTHOLE INVASION. Shouldn’t you top? And don’t most of Tingle’s books describe bottoming from first person POV?” 

Ren blushed even more. “Yeah, but the author really wants me to bottom and she doesn’t feel like spending the time on writing switching.” 

After giving a brief thought to the nihilistic despair of having his every move and urge controlled by someone from outside this ficlet, Hux said, “Ok, but let’s change the title to MY BILLIONAIRE BOSS INVADES MY DARK JEDI RAPTOR BUTTHOLE.” 

“Great. Now drill me, you ginger stud.” 

# MY BILLIONAIRE BOSS INVADES MY DARK JEDI RAPTOR BUTTHOLE

“Harder!” shouted Ren. “Make my raptor dick explode all over this control panel!”

“That would result in an incident report!” Hux screams back. 

“Then spank me for being bad!”

The author of this ficlet can’t remember whether or not Chuck Tingle has ever written spanking, so Hux hesitates a little before giving Ren a half-hearted slap on the ass. It does the trick though, and Ren’s rocketing prostate orgasm sent his spunk deep into the delicate circuits of the _Finalizer’s_ trash compacting system. Hux’s climax filled up Ren’s raptor butthole only seconds after. 

“That was the most incredible pounding of my life,” said Ren. “I could have done that forever.” 

“Let’s not,” Hux replied, looking around mistrustfully for the author. “At least, not until one of us has gotten a blowjob.”


End file.
